Waiting

 

I waited, knowing it would come. Maybe in a minute, perhaps in several hours, but it always came. I had to be there when the narcissist was around to make sure it didn’t get worse. When I didn’t wait, and when I wasn’t there, it was always escalated and amplified. I prayed for an end, dreamed, and longed for it, but instead, life stagnated and festered. It didn’t end until I made it stop, and it was treacherous and frightening, but utterly necessary.

I find myself waiting again with another narcissist. It’s not so bad this time, at least not on the surface. He has different ways, wears a different mask, and tells different lies. It’s bad enough that I failed to notice the signs again. Now, I’m waiting for an end, and I’m petrified. I know it won’t end until I make it stop, and I’m even more afraid this time because I know what lies ahead.

Author: Undeniably Sara

Abuse is an unfortunate reality in this world and is more than physical assault. The invisible trauma we suffer can result in chronic illness, which is a relentless beast gnawing away at the soundness of mind. Education and support from others are vital in the healing journey.

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