I have repeated many things I was too ignorant to repair. At one point I merely thought I just had bad luck with relationships. Many times I was told relationship failures were solely my responsibility. In truth, healthy boundaries were nonexistent in my life, and it took lots of pain and loss for me to see that.
Now I understand that because I did not respect myself, I allowed others to disrespect me. So, there is some validity to the statement that my failed relationships were my fault. I failed to repair my broken pieces and that invited manipulative, abusive people into my life. The process of repairing is well underway but still incomplete making me fear any new relationship.
I am hopeful that someday I will be well enough to have a healthy relationship. Until then being single and focusing on raising my children is more than enough to fill my days while the repairs continue.