There is no progress in blaming others, but I refuse to feel bad for the narcissist. It is possible, even likely that he suffered trauma in his childhood but that does not make his actions acceptable. Maybe, when he was still a young child, I could feel significant empathy towards him. The narcissist I know is a grown man who stood almost a foot taller than me and outweighed me by over one hundred pounds. If that is not intimidating, I shudder to think of the perception my children had when they were young. Regardless of his size advantage, he held nothing back while raging and thundering at us. I may understand part of why you were damaged, but I will not feel sorry for you.