Out of Order

Unknown Artist

This picture symbolizes how I feel today and all of last week with a non-stop migraine. I’ve been out of order but still trying to function. Every task requires so much more effort. I make so many mistakes that take even more time to go back and correct. The pain has subsided – for now, but I am thoroughly exhausted.

My body feels heavy and weak. My brain feels like it is swimming in soggy oatmeal, and my thoughts are slow and shallow. When I talk, many words are forgotten, slurred, or mispronounced. I make no sense, and I recognize the look on my children’s faces. They are worried, scared, and try to help me, all the while warning me not to do too much. “We don’t want your migraines to get any worse,” they say.

Chronic migraine hurts, and it scares my children. The latest migraine attack is the first time in many months a migraine has lasted more than a day or two. I’m desperate for the end of this episode.

Author: Undeniably Sara

Abuse is an unfortunate reality in this world and is more than physical assault. The invisible trauma we suffer can result in chronic illness, which is a relentless beast gnawing away at the soundness of mind. Education and support from others are vital in the healing journey.

31 thoughts on “Out of Order”

  1. I hear you! The worst part for me is my son worrying so much. We just lost my oldest son 3 1/2 years ago so I think this causes my younger son to be more frightened. The other day he was crying (he will be 20 soon) and he said “I am so worried about you, mom”. As mothers, I think seeing our children worry and not being able to do what we used to for them is the worst.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. For many years I suffered from cluster migraines that would last for days, sometimes weeks.
    Anyway, it turns out I have an extreme intolerance to artificial sweeteners, and ever since I changed my toothpaste, stopped using mouthwash and stopped chewing gum I’ve been migraine free. – Hope you feel better soon ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  3. They say if you have migraine, take 4 or 5 grams of salt and drink 1 litre of water and the problem is solved. Have you heard about it? I think it worth to try. I hope you get better.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ugh….that sounds like the worst: swimming in oatmeal ( my grains)…must feel like quicksand too. Your poor brain. Glad you were able to get some of those feelings out. Well articulated. So sorries to hear of theses mind pains.

    Liked by 1 person

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