Breaking Point

The stress, hurt, and fear piles on creating a jagged mountain of distress. Then, all it takes is a feather landing on top or a whisper of breath for it all to come tumbling down.   The taste of blood in the back of my throat, a raging migraine, and my heart beating out of my chest – the consequences of holding it all in for so long.  Afterward, there is clarity and motivation to carry on.
d8f993caed0c413979c5df8dd60ba199

Advertisements

Good Question

f85e553312602b784f70811aa64d9364

The Root of Education

a4506090a2a0092f8a38f3c6ec07d916

I’ll Crawl If I Must

This recent struggle is overwhelming and at times, unbearable.  It feels like running a marathon and sensing the finish line is within reach, but suddenly being forced to run with two broken legs.  It is the exhaustion setting in along with the absence of rest that weighs so heavily on the body and mind. There is no option to quit. There is no option for failure. I will crawl if I must, dragging these broken and bloody legs behind me to claim the prize – healing, rest and most of all, peace.

818adcaf4bd477c6122e0a66f2e22abe

Narcissists Do It On Purpose!

Realizing the narcissists in my life knew very well what they were doing was a revelation for me. They purposefully and knowingly hurt others without regret, empathy or taking responsibility. They are in control of their actions at all time because they must impress those who have yet to see behind the mask. Narcissists do it on purpose!

a4a73261b7e1068ed49d6643eeb052a3

An Excellent Father

In front of others, he’d let the kids do whatever they wanted.  They could climb the walls, and he would just sit there with a smile on his face.  Once we were alone, he’d rage at them, screaming about how they embarrassed him and made threats to thwart future bad behavior.  Some people were wise enough to sense something wasn’t quite right, but they couldn’t know how terrible it actually was when we were alone.  I once thought he was unable to control himself, but this behavior made it clear.  He knew what he was doing all along.  He controlled it when it suited him and hid it to preserve his public image which was always more important than his children.  Even now, he presents himself as “an excellent father” of three, but we know it’s only for show.

925cf968dbb12e840aa8f9d35c0cb411

What do you do for fun?

I remember struggling to think of something I enjoyed doing or even something I’d like to do.  I didn’t do anything for fun, and I felt embarrassed.  So much of my life was filled with the task of making others happy that I lost myself.   Fun is still something a bit foreign to me, but I’m learning to enjoy parts of my life again.  I’ll get back there, in time…

04a4efc69e965a4fe522fa0082456754